Dec 13, 2019 0 Comments
By Tiffany Villaluz
Ok, first things first! Is dating multiple people at the same time a question of morals?
Does that mean there’s a fine line between multiple dating and cheating?
Let’s explore this a little further…
Historically, I mean like, in the “olden days”, women would date several men, or be “courted” by multiple men at a time, and she’d then choose who she would like to marry. This was considered perfectly normal, ethical and is still how they do it in the USA.
You “date” until you have that “exclusive” conversation with the one person.
In current times, of course, things have changed. We’re by no means talking about marriage here! However, if you’re multiple dating in search of a serious relationship then “try before you buy” is definitely the way to go.
Multiple dating can be a very subjective topic, so let’s first define the difference between dating and being in a relationship.
Dating = non-serious and not mutually exclusive.
You could also say that dating is when you’re “testing the waters” with multiple people until you decide who you would like to have a relationship with.
In a relationship = serious and mutually exclusive.
Great! That makes perfect sense! So, with that, I provide you with some things to take into consideration when it comes to choosing to multiple date.
Be honest. always.
Of course, people multiple date and it’s perfectly acceptable. As long as all parties are aware and agree that it’s ok.
If you do decide to multiple date, then do it with a clear conscience. For example, if you’re in a relationship or marriage of convenience and both parties agree that it’s ok to date other people, go ahead.
If you’re just starting to date someone and keeping your options open, that’s fine too – as long as all parties are aware that you’re seeing other people.
Do you need to sew your wild oats? If the answer is yes, then by all means go ahead, just make sure you do it before you get into a committed relationship and do it safely!
Be sure you know what you actually want out of dating multiple people.
Dating multiple people at the same time also means finding the right people to date. Which means finding individuals that are secure enough in themselves and won’t be threatened, easily hurt or offended. Fact is, not everyone is going to appreciate the fact that you’re dating multiple people so be sure that it’s not a disaster waiting to happen…
So, from me it’s a big thumbs up to multiple dating! Think of it as being a contestant on the Bachelor or Bachelorette! During the dating process, you can pretty much do whatever you like (and we’ve all seen what happens on that show!)
However, bear in mind the “3 dates or more rule” – ok, it’s not really a rule! I just made it up, but it makes sense and goes like this – three successful dates with someone that you think you’d like to date some more means you should probably think about not seeing other people for a while. At least until you know whether the three dates will turn into thirty, which is then, essentially a relationship!
So, that’s it in a nutshell! It’s ok to multiple date as long you’re honest and upfront about what you’re doing.
And, by all means, date away!